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Why Don’t People Like Hillary Clinton?

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Although she’s secured the Democratic presidential nomination, many voters across all demographics are still hesitant to vote for Hillary Clinton. The Onion breaks down the reasons Clinton is having a hard time luring reluctant voters.


Iraq War

A large number of voters are unable to forgive Clinton’s support for the invasion of Iraq, even though she’s explained over and over again that 2003 was a long time ago

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Ties To Big Banks

Many perceive Clinton as having a cozy relationship with the financial sector, a criticism she’s spent millions in untraceable donations trying to fight against

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Policy-Driven Campaigning

Dry, wonkish speeches irritate the public by reminding them there are a wide variety of issues they should be paying attention to

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Looks

Clinton’s image is dogged by the unrealistic aesthetic standard set by her 43 predecessors

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Trustworthiness

Voters prefer a candidate whose backpedaling and flip-flopping on issues seems less calculated and strategic

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Garrison Keillor

Still holding a grudge about losing that 1997 Spoken Word Grammy


Personal History

Clinton would be the first U.S. president who has had sex with a U.S. president, and that’s weird

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Oratory Skill

Suffers from unfortunate speech impediment of sounding like a capable, self-possessed woman

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Statistics

Studies have shown that it is at least 35 percent more fun to dislike Clinton than it is to support her

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Sincerely Wants To Be President

Always a red flag